http://www.mamablogga.com/august-2009-group-writing-project/
So the topic of this post is : Before I was a mom.
I know some of you may think what does she have to say now? Her kids are all out of the house, married and with children or expecting children of their own. All of that is true but I'm not so far gone that I can't recall life before becoming a mother. I feel equipped to compare life before & after the arrival of the first child to stretch my imagination & take me to new heights in living life.
Before I was a mom I was in high school. My wedding day took place 2 days after my high school graduation. Before I was a mom I walked daily, basically everywhere. (Not so ever since.)
Before I was blessed with children I had an idea of what I wanted my life to look like (mind you this was before I met "the ONE" who changed that forever) ... I had even gone so far as to map it all out during a discussion with my girl friend ...we were sitting in her room and she was telling me how she knew what she wanted to study in college and how she wanted to be married and have several kids etc ... so she asked me what I wanted to do with my life after high school. I told her I wanted to go to college and I would go into an area that revolved around counseling. I wanted to meet my husband and get married around the age of 24, have the house with the white picket fence around our yard & have lots of room for our babies to grow. Ahh what a day dream that was. The fact is before I was a mom I was just a teenager with day dreams. During the last couple of months of my junior year of high school I met my husband. By the age of 16 I had already had 3 marriage proposals. I had turned them all down ~ first because they were all wrong for me and secondly because I knew what I wanted & expected out of life. Marriage wasn't top priority. In fact 2 weeks before I met my husband I had told my grandmother that I was done with boys for a while. I had decided to concentrate on finishing school and not bothering with guys. (mind you this followed 2 of the 3 marriage proposals) Then I met my husband and all that changed. In the very beginning of our relationship we fought. We fought on the day we met. We fought the next time we met. We fought the third time we met. ... see a theme here? It was around this time I had a phone call from a long distance guy friend ... he was soooo cute but too far away for me... anyway we were talking & I mentioned this guy that I had met and how every time we got around each other we'd end up fighting. For a second I thought the phone had gone dead. Then suddenly he starts telling me how I can't marry this guy because he has our life all planned. He basically proposed marriage to me but the catch was he was going into the service and then following how many yrs he planned on signing up for duty then we would marry at the age of 36. Needless to say he wasn't happy when I told him no thank you.
My husband and I had only met and seen each other for two weeks when he drops this on me ... (the scene: local ice cream parlor Sunday afternoon relaxed atmosphere) suddenly I hear him say; "So when are we getting married?" I respond; "Well I'm certainly not getting married until after I graduate high school." He asked me when graduation was, I pull out a small date book and look it up. He looks at the date book and said, "We can get married Sunday June 25, 1978" ~ yes he set the wedding date for 2 days after my graduation. Mind you I thought this was a joke. He was extremely serious. He went home and told everyone he was getting married and our wedding date was set.
Before I was a mom I was an engaged woman who didn't even realize she was actually engaged.
Monday in school I met up with my friend who had introduced me to my husband. She congratulated me on our upcoming wedding. How could he be serious? I thought he had been joking. And how could he have told everyone so quickly? I went home and that night I poured my heart out to God. I told God how I knew the first 3 marriage proposals were without merit. I also told Him how I had 'planned' what I was going to do with my life. Then I asked God to help me. I pleaded with Him to let me know what I was supposed to do. If this was really the man for me then I didn't want to lose him. But if he wasn't the One for me then I didn't want to lead him on either. Before I was a mom I prayed.
Before I was a mom I had a dream. A dream that set the course for my life. That night I dreamt of my wedding. I could see my groom. It was this man I barely knew yet felt connected with. I saw things in great detail. I saw the wedding gown, the veil, the church including the carpeting. When I woke up I prayed again. I told God that I would take that dream as an answer to my prayer of the night before but that as I lived through the year leading up to my wedding day if at any time something proved to me that I was making a mistake I would call it off. Before I was a mom I was a woman determined to make the right decision.
July 4, 1977 I was invited to attend a church picnic with my fiance's family. I heard how God wanted a personal relationship with everyone. God was alive and willing to have communication with us. Mind you I already believed in God and I had faith that He answered my prayers the dream of my wedding was not the first time I had felt that God had responded to me. When the Pastor asked who wanted to accept Christ as their personal savior my hand was up in a flash. Before I was a mom I was a woman in need of a Savior.
During that year I spent some time with my future mother in law. She asked me one day if I would consider wearing her wedding gown. As we climbed the stairs to go look at the dress I saw her wedding photo on the wall at the top of the staircase. It was the dress I saw in my dream. The veil was different but that was the same dress. I accepted her offer.
As the time drew closer I went shopping for a veil and I came across the same exact veil I had seen in my dream. I felt such confirmation everytime something happended that reflected my dream. One day while we were just relaxing we talked about some things and I mentioned that I wondered if we were really going to get married since he had never actually asked me to marry him. He got down on one knee and asked me to please become his wife.
The day came when we were going to the church (mind you I had never been there before in my life) and when we walked in I knew where everything was... it was exactly the same as in my dream. Right down to the ugly carpeting. (I'm sorry after all this time I still think that carpeting was ugly and it was a detail that proved beyond a shadow of doubt that God had shown me this was the man I was supposed to marry). Before I was a mom I was a woman in love, willing to spend forever with this one man. A month and a half after my 18th birthday I graduated from high school and two days after my graduation I married the man of my dreams (literally)!
Before I was a mom I was a bride. 31 years of marriage, 3 children, 3 children in love (our daughters & son in laws) and now grandbabies too ~ before I was a mom I could only hope and dream of all that life would hold for me and my family ... now I am a mom and a grandmomma and my best advice to share is to LOVE your family every day no matter what!!!!
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